This segment is called "Confessions", in which I reveal deep dark squishy, juicy secret facts.
I lick my butt when people are watching and I like it.
After I lick my butt and people look over in horror, I like this, too.
When people feel sick because I lick my butt and get up to get away from me for a minute, I like this because it means I now get a warm seat on the couch.
When people are not sick any longer and want to come back to the couch, I try to lick their butt, too, so that they will get angry and leave again so I can have my warm spot back.
I can think of more things, but I will hold back. This probably means I will have more confessions.
Always your buddy,
~Wally
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